Thanksliving: Gratitude Beyond The Holidays

Around this time of year, many of us feel a little more mindful, a little more grateful. But what if gratitude could be more than a holiday feeling? What if it was something we practice every single day?

I like to call this way of living Thanksliving: a daily practice of intentionally noticing and appreciating both the ordinary and extraordinary moments, even in the midst of life’s challenges. I stumbled on the phrase years ago and have kept it close ever since, because it captures the spirit of gratitude so well. Thanksliving isn’t about being overly positive, minimizing your feelings, or pretending everything is fine. Gratitude isn’t denial, it’s awareness. It’s noticing what matters and holding onto the good even when life is hard.

After caring for my mom through pancreatic cancer and working as a nurse in hospice, oncology, and family medicine, I don’t see gratitude as a “feel‑good” concept. It isn’t about ignoring the hard parts of life — it’s about recognizing the simple things we often take for granted, the very things someone else might give anything to experience.

I’ve cared for people who would simply love to:

• Breathe without effort

• Walk

• Live without pain

• Eat or drink without fear of pain, choking, nausea, or vomiting

• Shower without assistance

I’ve watched people fight for breaths I take without thinking. I’ve held hands with families who prayed for one more morning. I've held hands with families who prayed for the suffering to end. I’ve cared for patients whose only wish was more time. These moments stay with me and remind me to live more intentionally.

Gratitude Isn’t Just a Mood, It’s Medicine

One thing I’ve learned, both professionally and personally, is that gratitude is more than an emotion — it’s a physiological shift. A way to reset the nervous system. A way of grounding the body when life feels noisy and heavy. Research shows that practicing gratitude regularly can:

• Lower stress and cortisol

• Improve sleep

• Support heart health

• Strengthen the immune system

• Reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression

• Increase emotional resilience

• Improve overall well-being

 “Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind.” - unknown

Living Like I Mean It

I only get this one life, so I want to live like I mean it. To do that, I try to notice what my everyday life actually feels like.

The unexpected kindness of a stranger.

The relief of not having to drive (or drive far) in bad weather.

The comfort and warmth of my own bed.

The sound of someone I love walking through the door.

The beauty of sunrises and sunsets.

The quiet mornings for reading and writing.

The deliciousness of fresh baked sourdough bread.

The anticipation of weekly date nights.

The text that arrives at the exact moment I needed it.

The walk or coffee date with a pal.

The joy of perfect sunny 70-degree weather on my day off.

Having meals prepped so dinner feels effortless after long days.

The breath in my lungs.

The ability to go for a walk or to the gym. The pride and admiration when I witness someone who stands up for what's right.

Relishing playtime with my nephews because I know one day I won’t be the one they want to play with.

I could go on and on. I guess my work has been paying off:)

“Being thankful is not always experienced as a natural state of existence, we must work at it, akin to a type of strength training for the heart.” - attributed to Larissa Gomez

Digital Detoxing, Even in Small Doses

It doesn’t have to be forever — just intentional. No phones during meals. Turn off the notifications you don’t actually need. Take a few hours in the evening or on a weekend to be unreachable and unbothered. Even brief breaks from our phone, a few hours unplugged or one night a week without scrolling can lift our mood, ease anxiety or depressive symptoms, and improve focus. Gratitude grows in quiet spaces. And while we can’t always wait for quiet to appear on its own, we can choose to create it.

The Gift of Gratitude

Thanksliving has changed the way I show up, but it takes consistent, intentional effort to choose:

• Awareness over autopilot

• Presence over perfection

• Noticing the ordinary miracles

• Honoring my body for what it can do today

• Unplugging from the noise

• Appreciating the gifts that don’t make the highlight reel
  

Thanksliving doesn’t erase the hard parts of life. It helps us hold onto what’s good while moving through them. Gratitude can sit beside grief, illness, or exhaustion, gently reminding us that even in the hardest seasons, there are still gifts worth noticing.